"So yeah, there was a crazy twist with that whole thing too."

"Oh really?"

"Yeah, I told you how I have a criminal record right?"

"Um... no."

"Yeah."

"No... you? Really? What for?"

"Drug and Firearm possession... it was heroin or cocaine, I can't remember which..."

"What?"

"I'm pretty sure I mentioned it."

"Yeah, no... I'm pretty sure I would remember something like that."

"I'm sure I told you last year."

"Nope. I think that kind of thing would stick with me... it's not like you just got fined for speeding."

"Oh well... anyways, I have this criminal record right..."

Just another random actual conversation in the life of such. Seriously, when the straightest, best behaved, most upstanding people you have ever known turn out to have criminal records based on illegal firearm and drug possession, you know you might just be rolling with the wrong people.