Parents, are your children driving you crazy? Are the kids sick of those crappy colouring in books Nanna gave them two years ago? Are they tired of playing Pong on their Atari gaming system? Are you looking for a fun place to drop the kids this weekend, while you do some quiet shopping?

**Introducing the all new MONKEY BITS 2000!!!**

The MONKEY BITS 2000! is guaranteed to provide endless hours of fun for children of all ages! Either jump on the monkey's log, or get down on your hands and knees and clamber in between the monkey's legs for hours or even minutes of monkey related pleasure time!

The MONKEY BITS 2000! is non-toxic, and comes in a wide varitey of colours shapes and sizes, and is fully customisable depending on the individual clients needs and/or desires. To use your brand new MONKEY BITS 2000!, simply wash for hygene purposes, and using a large indistrial fan, blow on the monkey's log until firm.

(Caution : MONKEY BITS 2000! may need to be regularly blown with industrial fan to maintain its shape.)

...but really, all sexual connotations aside, would you really want to let your kid climb into something that resembles a monkey's vagina? I mean, they teach us to avoid that kind of stuff at school right?

"Kids, Mummy is tired, how about you all go play in the monkey's vagina for a while ok?"