I really did mean to go to church this morning, despite the fact that it was raining. As you know I believe rain is a heavenly sign that everyone should immediately stop what they are doing and return to bed, regardless of what activities are being undertaken, or the time of day. Rain equals bed - no argument...

But it was not the lovely rain that stopped me, it was not even my asthma that required me to sit on my bedroom floor hooked up to my nebuliser, that pumped the misty vapour concoction of oxygen and salbutamol into my lungs, making it easier to breathe, but also giving me the shakes and making my nose run. Neither was it my shortage of clean clothes, as I managed to scrape together an outfit from the threads I had left in my drawers. No, I blame automotive technology.

I got into the ute to drive to church, and noticed it had a full 6 inches of water sitting in the back tray... ironically as I got into the cabin, there was another 3 inch deep puddle on the floor. The seats were soaking, and water was dripping from the roof. There was water on the dash, and the little part between the seats that normally holds coins was now holding its own lake.

So I decided to take a gamble on my other car, which has been playing up of late... all I needed to do to get to it was to move my parents car out of the driveway. Which then wouldn't start. It just wheezed like a laughing evil villain with emphysema - in fact it sounded remarkably like Gollum coughing up his own lungs - the car just wheezed and stopped, wheezed and stopped, repeatedly. It wasn't the "little engine that could", it was the "little engine that couldn't be stuffed so sets about ruining your day". Pain in the ass car.

So I walked down the drive past the parents car to my commodore, just to see how it was going, seeing as though a part that recharges the battery as you drive needs replacing and I hadn't been willing to drive it. Obviously my car has turned emo since I last drove it. It hardly had enough energy to unlock the central locking doors and just sat there looking all pathetic. Try to turn over the engine? Have to be kidding. It just clicked a few times, and sat there feeling sorry for itself. My car has turned so emo I'm surprise it hasn't slashed its own tires over the weekend.

So dear diary, believe me when I say that I really was going to go this morning - but the cars were being proper knobs. One thought it was a SCUBA diver and went swimming, one thought it was Gollum and did nothing but wheeze and cough and die in the end, and the last one had promptly turned emo and wants to harm itself. If my cars were transformers I would totally make them kick each others asses.

P.S. - Speaking of transformers... why do we get the transformers movie over a week earlier than the USA? Normally we get movies later, yet somewhere I saw it advertised with screenings beginning on the 28th of June. Odd.