Last night I was asked by a girl (who requests to remain nameless) to go out and have a nice dinner and do something romantic. Now, I'm not the most romantic chump on the block. In fact it is probably safe to say that I am about as romantic as mashed potato. I see myself more as the stay at home guy... to be honest, my idea of a great night out is to sit at home, eating junkfood and watching a dvd where one guy gets angry and starts killing everybody with a blunt chairleg.

So we compromised... a night time stroll along the beach, after stopping to grab some food at kfc.

There are some lessons in life that are just beyond me... one of them being that junkfood is just that... 'JUNK-food'. I am happy to report that KFC is now firmly entrenched within my thinking as junk food after last nights events.

We walked in, ordered our food and waited... Normally I don't care what food they give me, as long as it is remotely edible, but she is a go-getter type of girl, who asks for, and gets exactly what she wants. She asked for fresh fries, not the ones that had been sitting in the fries tray, all alone and exposed for the last 30 mins.

It was about here in the night I stopped paying attention to what was going on. But she has eyes in the back of her head... and saw what was going on.

Girl : "Are you just putting those old chips back and re-frying them?"
Pimple boy : "Um... Yes?"
Girl : "Serious? Can we have FRESH NEW chips please?"
Pimple boy: "ahh... ok... yeah."

I thought that 'New / Fresh' chips was a different phrase to 'old reheated' chips. Obviously pimple boy got them confused, and looked rather embarressed that KFC had been caught out, re-cooking food and passing it off as fresh. Especially after their huge campaign about how they really do use fresh foods in their products.

Seriously. Gross. All the chicken tasted pretty average... but hey, at least we had good chips and gravy (and heart disease) right? Needless to say, our romantic stroll along the beach was a little bit destroyed after one of us started getting sick with major stomach cramps. Now, I don't want to go around naming and shaming, but those of you that know me, know that I have the stomach lining of a rodent, and can eat just about anything... most of the time. So it may not have been me rolling around on the sand feeling sick and in pain from infected re-heated Kentucky Fried Chicken.

Alas, old man Kernel Sanders, where have you gone? Would you have allowed those pimply faced teens to get away with ruining your great fast food chicken name?

And Kernel Sanders, also what is with your new hair style. Your new slick logo does not instill in me the trust of Generations past. It looks a little too comb-over. I understand that you have to look good hot girl aliens now Kernel, seeing as your giant head is being beamed out into space from the desert floor, but last time I checked, aliens weren't eating at KFC... Please lift your game.

Your former fan.