I believe congratulations are in order, for Lauren and Chris, who welcomed their little son into the world recently. I present to you, little 'Xander Isaac Green-Larson'.

This little guy has a lot going for him. Firstly, he has a double barrelled surname. Good things come in pairs... Boobs, shotgun barrels, Chuck Norris' arms (and legs for that matter), neighbors cats and my car tyres. The list is endless.

The second thing, is that his first name is Xander. Xander, with an X. 'Mr X. Green-Larson. He sounds like a superhero villain, and we all know how cool they are... There is no way a kid with the name Xander will be getting bullied in the playground in year three. Xander is the type of kid that grows up to rule the play equipment, have the nerds do his homework, and be paid lunch money 'tribute' from all the lesser children.

And finally, this kid came fully equipped with the 'Chuck Norris guide to Kung-Fu' video tucked inside his umbilical cord. You don't believe me? Just take one look at those pics and tell me his fists aren't instruments of death. He looks ready for a fight. Sure, it's hard to look tough when your naked in a sink, but trust me, that kid is ready to punch the head of the nearest Winnie the Pooh soft toy.

Well, Loz and Chris, congrats on your mini Chuck Norris.

Will